Behind the Blog - The Real World of Two Parents, with Two Kids, on the Road

Looking for poignant moments revolving around the last cookie on Friday night when the markets are about to close? Ferocious battles over who gets to lie on the big couch?  Quotidian pleasures dissolving into mundane bickering? Reality show superstars, eat your heart out! The Bruner Family Journey has you beat. We don't have a webcam capturing our minute-to-minute saga, but here's a peek "Behind the Blog."

It's not all about ancient ruins, world-renowned historical sites, unique cultural experiences, and beautiful beaches. Sometimes, it's really just all about the Nickelodeon Channel. The kids are so eager for television that they will even watch in Hebrew - which we parents justify as language practice.  How else will they learn that Sponge Bob in Hebrew is “Bob Sponge”?  Other valuable lessons can be learned - in both Hebrew and Arabic - from watching one of TV's premiere educational shows, The Simpsons. 

Out of respect for the kids (and their wonderful teachers over the past few years), we must add that we also do a lot of reading (in English). And now for some shameless product placement: WE LOVE OUR KINDLE!! We thought we'd lament the fact that our son was going electronic and missing the feeling of real, worn pages in his hands, but now we're total converts. Jeremy is a voracious reader and we can't imagine how we could feed his endless appetite for books if we couldn't download new ones in just one click. (Yes, the books cost about $7 a pop, but what's a few shekels for hours of peace and quiet?)

Also - ooh, another opportunity for shameless product placement! - we'd be nothing without our Toshiba Netbook. We e-mail, we check the news and sports scores (Go SF Giants!), and we do hours of research and writing for this blog. We're not the only ones typing away, though. Talia has taken up an interest in typing random strings of letters for pages on end, and Jeremy likes to escape occasionally into the e-world of Club Penguin. (Any kids out there with Penguins, please let us know. Jeremy will meet you on line.)

The computer is also a great tool for our adventures. You can find our apartment building on Google Maps (Efrayim 7, Ramat Gan, Israel – check it out!), and we have spent hours poring over the routes for Tel Aviv's Dan bus system. (We are regulars on the #61, which stops just two blocks from our apartment and hits all the Tel Aviv hot spots.)  We also check the Tel Aviv weather daily, as we try to figure out when it's going to cool down. 

Since we're on a roll with blatant product advertisements, let's also give it up for "Taki" (an Israeli card game similar to Crazy Eights), which has become Talia's new obsession - along with her long-held passion for drawing.

But there's more to our day than going to school, reading, watching television, drawing pictures and playing cards.  For example, have you had an argument with a member of your family lately?

Parenting isn't any easier on the road – and we suppose that being a kid isn't any easier, either. In fact, we've all been put to the test by the stressful parts of this experience – and the immense transition it represents. As parents, we have to remind ourselves that we took our children away from everything that was familiar to them (we sold the house and cars, pulled them out of school, put most of their toys in long-term storage, and made them say “goodbye” to friends and family), and then we dropped them for 5 hours a day with a group of total strangers in a cacophony of indecipherable Hebrew. It's hard for them to figure what's going on, much less to make new friends (although we're pleased to report that Jeremy had a playdate with the one classmate who speaks some English).

Given the strange new world they've been thrust into, it's no wonder the kids seem lonely and angry at times.  We've gotten more than the typical backtalk, some loud tantrums, and even the occasional shove. Or, Jeremy ignores us and claims he's "temporarily deaf."  They've also been bickering and have had some knock-down, drag 'em out fights between themselves. They are at their lovable best, though, when they work together to plot against us with humor, as they did in the infamous kitchen rebellion of September 20.

We've done “bad parent” stuff too – like yelling and scolding and taking away TV time.  Like all good reality shows, though, this one is breaking us down and building us up. We're all working on talking (not yelling), using kind, calm words (not scolding), and not hitting (or kicking or poking or pushing or pulling hair). We're also making sure each child gets "special time" with each parent, like playing in the park, or going out to eat sushi, shwarma or ice cream.  And we found a Hebrew tutor for Jeremy, which he really seems to enjoy.

Special time (and wearing Mom's glasses) makes Jeremy feel cool

Talia at the park right near our apartment

Jeremy shows off his chopsticks skills

For those of you who are wondering, yes, Marc finished most of Talia's shwarma

Jeremy pays for his ice cream at the makolet

Talia shares her ice cream with Baby

Jeremy studies Hebrew

Unlike so many reality shows, this real world is actually getting better. Sure, there have been ups and downs, but all in all the kids are doing a great job adjusting to the dramatic changes they are facing.  We recently started a mensch jar (todah rabah to Jeremy's teacher at CCJDS, Hadas Rave, who introduced this idea – it's a jar we put slips of paper into describing each others' good deeds). This morning, we were able to write mensch slips for both kids, who got ready for school with smiles and a cooperative attitude.  Maybe they'll write one for us, since we haven't yelled in a week.  Well, probably not, but we think the approach is working.

We're humbled by the challenges of life on the road, but we truly believe they are making us all stronger - as individuals and as a family.  After a recent meltdown that was particularly hot-tempered, we asked Talia what she needed from us to help her act nicely. With timeless and ageless wisdom, she replied: “Love, love and more love."